Artist's Way

Walking in This World Check In – April 30, 2012

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Greetings fellow travelers, 

This past week I wrote 6/7 Morning Pages. I experimented once and typed my Morning Pages to see how many I could type in 30 minutes. I discovered I could type 1.557 words. I didn’t realize I wrote so much it’s almost the same amount recommended for NaNoWriMo which is 1,667 words per day. I am considering doing a writing streak http://writingstreak.org in May to keep track of how much I write. Between my Morning Pages, my long term goals, and my Map I am working on I want to keep track of my writing progress.  

Someone sent me a challenge to write a blog on a schedule at Blog Me Maybe http://www.julianahaygert.com/2012/blog-me-maybe. I am debating about whether or not I want to take on this particular challenge. I know I am already going to be writing a lot without doing daily blogs. Part of me wants to try it though to see what would happen and if traffic to my blog site would increase or not. I am still thinking about this. 

After recommendation of a fellow Artist’s Way Circle member, I downloaded and am trying out Scrivener tool for writers for 30 days. Scrivener is a ring-binder, a scrapbook, a corkboard, an outliner and text editor all rolled into one. So  far, I have imported my “Two Step” novel draft after I read a delicious email from Lindsey Grant of NaNoWriMo about the beauty of revising your novel. I have been reluctant to revise my novel and have put it off for four years since “Two Step” has been written. Hopefully, I can figure out how to break my novel down into smaller pieces. Also, I started another project in Scrivener I am titling My Map that plans my goals for the next five years of my artist journey. Hopefully, with a Map I can better see where I am going. 

My Artist’s Date I have read five chapters in “A New Earth” by Eckhart Tolle. I had previously watched a video series between Oprah and Eckhart Tolle discussing the book. Now I finally have the book and time to read it. I have been making notes in the margins. A synchronicity is that a friend of mine emailed me and said she just received that same book. I raised the idea of us both going through the book together. She said if she had questions she would ask me. 

I walked around my building for 20 minutes. As I walked I loved the crisp air of spring which is my favorite season and is great for walking. I came around the bend and I saw a bunny. 

Issues of recovery is taking baby steps towards my dreams. I don’t have to do everything today. I can make some priorities. I have other writing projects, but I decided My Map is important to me first. 

Warm regards, 

Buffy

 

Artist's Way

Walking in This World Check in April 23, 2012

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Greetings fellow travelers,

Week 5 Walking in This World check In. I wrote 6/7 Morning Pages this week. Busy week with extra trainings that one day slipped past me or I would have had 7/7 this week. So close.

My Artist’s Date was finishing the second book “Compass of the Heart” of the Patricia Cogan triology. It was a love story of a white pyschologist falling in love with a Native American medicine man, two worlds collide. There was a scene in the story that deeply moved me. One of the main characters was singing a Lakota song and the words of the song were written in the book. Ironically, I knew the melody of the song and began to sing the song out loud. This brought back fond memories of my foster mother who was a pipe carrier and who taught me this Lakota song. I felt connected.

I walked at night for twenty minutes in my neighborhood. It was a brisk and peaceful walk.

My issue of recovery is embracing that I am a successful artist. A few friends of mine declared that I was a successful artist and for some reason I bristled at this. I initially said that I don’t see myself as a successful artist yet but that I was on the path to being a successful artist. However my friends would not accept this and lovingly corrected me that indeed I am a successful artist.

I had a playdate with my sister. She brought colorful balloons and a pump for making balloon animals. She also brought the ingredients to make asparagus and strawberry pizza she invented homemade as seen in the picture above. I actually thought it could use more strawberries I enjoyed it so much.

Warm regards,
Buffy

 

 

Artist's Way

Walking in This World Check in April 17, 2012

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Greetings fellow travelers, 

I did 5/7 Morning Pages. It just slips my mind sometimes because I have so much going on especially with work. I am trying to put a newsletter together but the articles are coming in past the deadline which keeps throwing off my layout and printing schedule. I wrote two newsletter articles, “Cards of Hope” and “The Artist’s Way Circle.” I talked with a song writer and joined a Google+ songwriting group. My Artist’s Date was exploring Pottermore.com which finally became open to everyone after 6 months of waiting to get in. It was cool to explore and find hidden coins, herbs, and books in the scenes. I am good at potions so far, but suck at casting spells and dueling. Synchronicity I really wanted to get into Pottermore and when I checked it was finally open to the public for the first time. The little kid in me was excited! My issue of recovery was to let outside problems go and not let it distract me from my own personal recovery. To keep moving forward. Rest if I must, but to keep taking steps again when I can. 

Warm regards, 

Buffy

Artist's Way

Walking in This World Check In April 9, 2012

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Greetings fellow travelers,

This quote best sums up how I feel who I am. This is how I see myself and my role in The Artist’s Way. It’s also why I say Greetings fellow travelers.

“I’m not a teacher: only a fellow-traveler of who you asked the way.

I pointed ahead – ahead of myself as well as you.”

-George Bernard Shaw

I did 5/7 Morning Pages. My Artist’s Date I went to a local store to pick up a new artsy Morning Pages notebook and boy did I find an unusual one. My notebook came with a Crayola pen called “Wild Notes” that when you write it turns different colors red, blue, green, and purple. As I used this unique pen I wondered about it’s technology that was making this a possibility to change colors so with the same ink. I did an entire day’s worth Morning Pages with this pen and I stared at the varied cotton colored phasing in and out of colors of my ink over the entire three pages. It was quite surreal. I have in the past used a purple or a pink pen to fill my Morning Pages, but never before four different colors all the same page. It was quite a site. And very pretty. The cover of my notebook is black background with cursive writing across in shades of blue, yellow, orange, and red. It tickled my inner child. At this Artist’s Date I also looked for supplies to complete the colalge in the third week task of “Walking in This World.” I was looking for poster board which I did see this particular store carry before, but the day I did the Artist’s Date there was no poster board to be found. I also came home and I thought I had some rubber cement and discovered mine was all dried out and empty. I was frustrated thinking I couldn’t completed the collage task. So, I was reading the comments on The Artist’s Way Circle on Facebook and one of the members made a collage using a free site on the internet called Photovisi http://www.photovisi.com That site is such a fun site and I totally loved the freedom to experiment and play with my collage. There were different backgrounds and layouts. Lots of choices of colors and fonts. My boyfriend and I are doing “Walking in This World” together including going on the walks together and we put this collage together. We both made decisions on what to use and incorporate in our collage. The collage above is the end result of our creative collaboration. Creative collaboration is so much fun! I think the member in The Artist’s Way Circle pointing out Photovisi as a wonderful synchronicity and solution to make our collage since I couldn’t find the poster board.

I walked 40 minutes this week going to and from the store where I participated in my Artist’s Date. I noticed the beauty of the daffodils and the purple flowers in the trees. The air was crisp and wonderful. I had a good walk, but I still finding myself needing to sit after short distances. I hope that my stamina for walking will improve.

This past week I learned a lot about myself. I became more aware of my true nature. I live my life hiding in an attic like in the “Hiding Room.” I want to spend more time expressing myself. I want to get most out of my life. I experienced another synchronicity. I wrote in my Morning Pages about how I was to proceed with all of the creative dreams that I have and to my surprise I discovered this poem that seemed to fit the request I made in the Morning Pages.

I will not die an unlived life.
I will not live in fear
of falling or catching fire.
I choose to inhabit my days,
to allow my living to open me,
to make me less afraid,
more accessible,
to loosen my heart
until it becomes a wing,
a torch, a promise.
I choose to risk my significance;
to live so that which came to me as seed
goes to the next as blossom
and that which came to me as blossom, goes on as fruit.

Fully Alive – Dawna Markova

Warm regards,
Buffy

Artist's Way

Walking in This World Check In April 3, 2012

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Greetings fellow travelers,

This is week two check-in in “Walking in This World” by Julia Cameron. I was able to do 5 out 7 days writing my Morning Pages. I recently received some very bad news and I found myself shutting down and unable to write on the last days. I turned to outside help and they have been helping me work through it.

I did the Artist’s Date that Julia Cameron indicated in Task: Identify Your Identity on page 41 which states “Schedule an hour’s undivided time and take your adult self on some small walking adventure. Do not be surprised if many feelings and intutions and insights bubble to the surface during this Artist’s Date.” I ventured out from my home into the overcast day wearing my light coat. I walk with difficulty because of my physical handicap. I can only walk so long so I go to the nearest coffee shop to get a refreshment of Clementine soda, strawberry yogurt, and a glazed doughnut. I hadn’t had breakfast yet and I was hungry. I watched other people enjoying their coffee typing away in their keyboards. I ate quickly because I wanted to get out to walking again. I walked to a local store to find they were not open. I walked to a gym and watched people excercising on exercise machines. Wondering what their pool looked like. I walked as far as I could and finally sat down at a bus stop. I waved passed a bus that thought I might want to catch the bus which I didn’t. Just as I was sitting at the bus stop the sun finally broke through the clouds. It was beautiful to behold everything in glowing radiant sunlight. I miss the days when I could walk comfortably. I used to take very long walks in the past. Today, I am glad I could walk as much as I could during the hour. It felt good to be a part of the community.

In addition to Julia Cameron’s indicated Artist’s Date hour walk, I also did the recommended 20 minute walk. It was a short walk in my neighborhood where I had an appointment. Not as leisurely as the Artist’s Date’s hour walk because I was trying to make the appointment on time. It was a good walk though. Still wanting to take my camera on my walk to take pictures.

Issue of recovery was focusing on self care and security. I am glad I asked for help and I shared what went on with me this past week because of the bad news and how it impacts my ability to move forward. Strong feelings over the situation surfaced and I was able to get support from others and do extra self care to handle it all. The excellent self care portion of my creativity contract comes to mind right now.

Warm regards,
Buffy

Artist's Way

Walking in This World Check In March 26, 2012

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Greetings fellow travelers,

I did 7/7 Morning pages writing three pages each day. I am so happy I reached so many pages this week and I am very excited about doing that.

My Artist’s Date I scheduled in my calendar the exact day and time I was going to do it. I decided to get a camera that could record video. I took cab to the local electronics store and on the way I almost made a u turn and was going to go buy something “practical” like clothes. I wrestled with myself and decided to let my inner child have her camera. I happily got to the electronics store and met the store clerk who helped me selecting my camera. The camera I purchased was on sale and later I learned was the exact same brand and model used by my favorite vlogger Charles Trippy on CTFxC. So, that made the purchase all the more special in addition to being significanly less than what I thought I was going to have to pay. After I left the electronics store, I was hungry and went to an Asian restaraunt where I had the most delicious pineapple and coconut smoothie I ever had and sweet and sour chicken. I wish my camera was fully charged so I could take a picture of the meal that was presented to me. Then I explored a professional camera store which had cameras hundreds of dollars outside of my price range. They had photography classes and expert staff. It made me wonder if I ever wanted to take photography seriously I could go there to dig in deeper. Right now I need to learn how to use my $99 Cannon camera. Finally, I decided to go to the dollar store where I could purchase whimsical items for my Artist’s Altar. I gravitated towards this heart with a rainbow which to me symbolized the love shared between me and my boyfriend who is also doing Walking In This World with me. I also proceeded to purchase artificial lilacs flowers in blue, purple, and white. I got some gel clings of spring flowers and butterflies for my bathroom mirror. As I exited I made an impulse purchase to get jellybelly beans, which had to my joy my favorite flavor buttered popcorn. I spent a total of an hour and forty minutes to do all of these wonderful experiences for my Artist’s Date.

I did my walk indoors in my apartment building which had several floors with my boyfriend. We quitely went up and down the halls while holding and hands which was very romantic. Julia Cameron is totally right. It’s awesome to walk with loved ones.

Synchronicity was the fact that my camera that I purchased was on saled $80 off. Pluse the memory card was also on sale. I walked out of the store with money still in my pocket.

Issues of recovery. In Assertiveness class I came to realize that I identify myself as Buffy, that is my inner child. That when I was little that’s all I remember my family calling me. It wasn’t until I started kindgeraten that I first learned that my legal name is really Wenona. I remember sitting in the office with a school administrator and my mother and the administrator asked me what my name was. I knew that answer, and proudly said “My name is Buffy!” The administrator twisted her face and looked all confused like I had said the wrong name and began looking at paperwok and then suddenly my mom began snickering in the corner. My mother than explained to the woman that everybody at home calls me Buffy. But my teachers in school never called me Buffy they only would call me Wenona and there began the split to my identity. Add to it that I grew up in foster homes it became harder and harder to assert to people that the name I identify with and resonate with me is Buffy. So, I want to assert in my life I am Buffy. That is who I see myself as. That is who my identity is. I believe the more I assert that I am Buffy the more that I can assert other aspects of my personality again including my creativity.

I am happy to say that I have been playing my Native American flute. Julia Cameron says in Wakling In This World that if you want to learn to play the piano you need to touch the keys. So, I touch the holes in my flute and blew into it. I played scales and practiced fingering. I used to play the Clarinet in school for about 10 years, and I used to be on a very rigid practice schedule everyday. At one point I used to play my clarinet 6 hours a day and I used to be in three bands, two orchestras, and a musical. I don’t know if I want to get that intense with my Native American flute, but I do know the value of regular practice. THe photo in this blog is a picture of me playing my Native American flute at Alverno College.

Warm regards,
Buffy

Artist's Way

Signing the Creativity Contract

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       For me signing the Creativity Contract is most important part of “The Artist’s Way” or “Walking in This World” journey. While yes I am agreeing to use the tools, readings, tasks, and check-ins more importantly I am making a promise to myself to take excellent self care of myself. That I get proper amount of sleep, wholesome nourishing food, and gentle companionship are vital for my creative recovery journey.
I decorated my Creativity Contract and placed it near my computer desk where I can prominently see it. I like the colors because they’re so vibrant and alive. I selected this particular image because of several reasons. It reminded me of the story of Footprints in the Sand. The direction of the foot prints also makes me think of Creator walking towards me or that I am walking closer to myself get to know myself better.
Have you signed your creativity contract? Have you decorated your creative contract and made it your own? Have you hung up your creativity contract where you can see it and remind yourself of your commitment to yourself?

Buffy